You Won’t Believe What I Discovered About Happiness in Solitude—#3 Will Shock You!

In an age where social media influencers dictate trends and lifestyles, the question arises: Do we really need them to navigate our world? This inquiry is particularly relevant in a landscape saturated with curated experiences, where platforms like TikTok and YouTube provide step-by-step guides on everything from solo travel to dining alone. As someone who thrives in my own company, I find the proliferation of advice for the solo adventurer both enlightening and concerning.

On a sunny March afternoon, I donned my favorite footy scarf and set off for a half-hour walk to the Melbourne Cricket Ground (MCG). With a podcast in my ears, I sidestepped families checking directions and navigated queues snaking around the donut van outside gate 2. As I settled into my seat in the Shane Warne Stand, I felt the familiar rush of excitement as the Tigers’ theme song echoed from the speakers. Throughout the match, I interacted with an English tourist experiencing his first Australian Rules game, reminding me that even in solitude, connections can form.

Yet, the notion that spending time alone needs a guidebook or social validation is a curious one. Influencers and content creators have sprung up to reassure the anxious soloist that it’s perfectly acceptable to enjoy a book at a bar, or to savor a meal without a dining companion. The underlying fear in their audiences echoes a broader societal concern: What will others think? Are we perceived as lonely or sad for choosing solitude over social obligations?

This widespread anxiety highlights how unconventional it can feel for many to embrace self-sufficiency in public spaces. Throughout the Melbourne International Film Festival, I often indulge in a solo film marathon, watching four or five movies in one day. While I occasionally meet friends to discuss our favorites or share a meal, my default setting is to prioritize my own interests. This routine—booking the films I want to see, reading a paperback between shows, and choosing my own aisle seat—brings me immense joy. It’s an act of hyper-independence as much as it is a practical choice amidst busy schedules and adult responsibilities.

However, it’s not always easy or cost-effective to venture out alone. A few years ago, Arts Centre Melbourne sparked discussions about the “single tax” in the theater industry, where tickets are often only sold in pairs, effectively penalizing those who prefer their own company. Similarly, when planning trips, I’ve encountered inflated travel packages that treat solo travelers as a liability instead of an opportunity. In a world designed for couples and families, stepping out alone can be a logistical challenge, but the rewards often outweigh the hurdles.

Next month, I’ll be embarking on a three-week journey to the UK and Europe, navigating the landscape on my own terms. Friends will join me for select experiences—visiting galleries, indulging in expensive French facials, and dining at trendy restaurants—but for the most part, I’ll be making decisions solely for myself. The thought of walking into a wine bar in Paris and requesting “Une table pour une, s’il vous plaît” fills me with excitement, not dread. While influencers may warn that such actions could make one appear tragic, I firmly believe that the alternative—missing out on unique experiences—is far worse.

Ultimately, as we navigate a world increasingly guided by social media, it’s essential to recognize that enjoying solitude can be both fulfilling and liberating. The growing body of online advice surrounding solo adventures may serve a purpose, particularly for those who struggle with anxiety or self-doubt. Yet, it’s essential to remember that solitude does not inherently equate to loneliness. It’s a personal journey, one that many of us are rediscovering in our own ways.